


Harry's "Inflatuating" Secret

by Mr_Stylinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Crack, Fainting, Farting, Funny, Gen, Harry Loves Tacos, Harry-centric, Hostage Situations, Humor, Implied Zayn Malik/Liam Payne, Insecure Harry, Mature Liam, Poor Justin Bieber, Poor Modest Management, Scents & Smells
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-25 22:29:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10773780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Stylinson/pseuds/Mr_Stylinson
Summary: An imaginary lightbulb popped above Louis' head. The Doncaster lad smirked while looking at their youngest member. “I dislike when Harry farts and pretends it's not him for literally ten minutes.” He emphasized the last part of his sentence. Liam, Niall, and Zayn promptly concurred.Harry shook his head and smiled while trying to hold back a laugh.Really, Louis? This is what you decided to bring up?“Sometimes I admit it.” He defended, going along with the joke while the others swiftly held firm to their denials.And It was only a joke, intended to make the viewers laugh. None of the boys counted on it ever becoming a very real predicament.Crackfic with fart humor and utter ridiculousness, you've been warned.





	Harry's "Inflatuating" Secret

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgEIFPdzS7Q

Harry was sat in a chair, smirking down at his prize. He licked his lips in anticipation, drumming his fingers in midair. “Soon you shall belong to me.” He chuckled evilly, knowing that his prey stood no chance against him.

Harry reached down and picked up one of the tacos on his plate. He brought the food to his mouth and took a generous bite out of it, one that would have put Niall to shame. Harry closed his eyes as the hard tortilla shell crunched under the pressure of his teeth, treating his taste buds with juices from the ground meat and tomatoes, combined with the melange of refried beans, crisp lettuce, and cheese.

The curly-haired lad sucked off some taco residue off his finger before digging into the other taco. Once he was completely done with his meal, he sighed and patted his tummy with satisfaction. He got up and proceeded for the tour bus, but not before thanking the band's stylist Caroline for bringing the tacos.

Harry approached a fenced area where the bus was parked within, the entrance being guarded by Paul. They briefly exchanged greetings as Harry went by.

“Harry.” Paul nodded.

“Evening, Paul.”

Paul froze for a moment, taking a deep whiff of air. He scanned around, looking for the source of the unpleasant odor. Seeing nothing out of the ordinary, he then bent over and lifted one of his feet up to examine the bottom of his shoe, which was spot clean. He hummed in confusion as he went to study the bottom of his other shoe.

Harry entered the tour bus, where the other boys were sitting around, talking about an upcoming house party they were all expected to make an appearance at. There was going to be other singers there and everything.

The boys all acknowledged Harry's arrival cheerfully. Louis, who was on one of the couches, reached over, wrapped his arms around Harry's waist and pulled the younger boy onto his lap. Harry relaxed under the level of comfort that washed over him. There was nothing quite like being around his best mates, except perhaps being around family, in which case being with his 'brothers' was a very close second.

A tranquil silence filled the bus, everyone was tired after the show they'd just done, and they were taking advantage of the opportunity to kick back and unwind. Louis was leaning back on the sofa, Harry lying over Louis' chest. Liam was reading a book, Zayn was listening to music, and Niall was looking at his phone.

Louis felt his eyes start to droop, when he took a deep breath, his eyes shot open, his face scrunched up. He sniffed once more, confirming his worst fear. He slowly turned to face the mop of brown curls on his bosom. “Har--”

“Ugh!” Niall exclaimed, covering his face with one hand. “Who did that?!” He shot daggers toward his right. “It was you, Zayn, wasn't it?”

“Don't look at me!” The raven-haired boy protested, holding his hands up in defense. “I bet it was Liam!”

“It most certainly was not me.”

“Then who--”

“Harry?” Louis spoke with a raised eyebrow. Harry shrunk back a little under the four pairs of eyes staring at him.

“Was that you, Harry?” Niall inquired as he turned around to open one of the windows all the way.

“Um...” Harry drawled before realizing that he was taking longer than necessary to answer. “No?”

“Harry, that _was_ you!” Louis insisted. “I felt it on my leg!”

“Lord have mercy.” Liam slammed his book shut and waved a hand in front of his face in an attempt to fan away the horrible smell. “What did you eat today, Harry?”

“Um, let's see.” Harry pondered. “I had cereal at breakfast time, and I had chicken for lunch.”

“Anything else?” Zayn asked nasally, his fingers pinching his nose.

“Well, Caroline gave me some tacos for supper.”

“I suppose there were beans in these tacos, yeah?” Louis sighed exasperatingly.

Harry blushed. “Sorry.” He mumbled sheepishly.

“Little too late for that, don't ya think?” Niall snapped from where he was currently positioned, standing on the couch leaning out of the window. “You could have given us a proper warning!”

Harry felt the edge of his lips turn upward, now finding amusement out of the whole situation. “Sorry.” He repeated.

* * *

The boys trudged into the spacious room where management had called them into for a surprise meeting. The area had a long table with a dark polished wood finish, there were plenty of chairs, potted plants were situated in each corner of the room, and light from the cloud covered sky came in from the huge window. James, one of the managers, and the only other person in the room besides the boys, was seated at one end of the table by the window. He had in front of him a laptop and several papers.

“Ah, boys, come on in. Take a seat.” He acknowledged. Liam took the seat closest to the man, Louis sat to Liam's right, with Harry next to Louis, followed by Zayn, then Niall. “I suppose you are curious as to why I called you here on such short notice.” James began. “As you may or may not be aware of, there has been a number of _rumors_ circulating the web lately about two of you being in a relationship.” He eyed Louis and Harry.

“It's true, though.” Liam shrugged.

James rolled his eyes. “In any case, we fear that this will not sit well with your female fans, which, might I add, make up for more than 90% of your fanbase.” He started gathering papers and stacking them neatly before removing one and laying it on the table, sliding it towards Harry. “For you, Mr. Styles, we have a list of beards, you will be seen in public with the woman of your choice and we will handle the media regarding your new 'girlfriend'.”

Harry stared at the paper, he frowned and shook his head. “I don't want a fake girlfriend, or any girlfriend. I want what I already have.” He brought his arms up and wrapped them around Louis' neck, causing James to roll his eyes again.

“I'm afraid that's not up to you, Harry. Lest you've forgotten about the contract you signed.” He then alternated his gaze between Liam and Zayn. “And don't either of you two make me have to hold this conversation a second time.”

Harry sighed and released his grasp on Louis. He didn't want to do this, he didn't want to pretend to be in a relationship with a woman he barely even knew, taking away the time he could be spending with Louis. The others shot Harry sympathetic looks while James sat with his hands folded over the table, patiently waiting for Harry to make a decision.

Could this day possibly get any worse?

Harry stilled when he felt his stomach grumble and an uneasy pressure build up within his lower intestine. His gut made noises that sounded like a bullfrog karaoke competition. He shut his eyes and his breathing became heavier. _No, not now. I can't do this here!_

“I'm not giving you a choice on that matter.” James said sternly, apparently Harry's thoughts had been spoken aloud. “You are not leaving this room until you've selected a beard.”

Harry's stomach continued to protest, sweat poured down his face. The boys were looking at hims with concern. “Harry, are you all right?” Liam asked. Harry swallowed and quickly shook his head.

“What's the matter?” Louis was now worried that something was wrong with Harry.

“I don't think Harry's feeling well.” Zayn pointed out. “Could we take a break, please?”

“Knock it off, Styles.” James demanded. “You're not weaseling your way out this that easily.”

Harry clenched his lips together as the hot air emitted from his bum, he sighed with relief and relaxed in the chair, now free from the agonizing pressure. James grew frustrated and stood up from his chair and walked over to the content boy.

“We really don't want to make this decision for you, but you are leaving us with limited options.” He grumbled and picked up the sheet of paper, shoving it in Harry's face. “Would you prefer to hang out with Taylor Swift? That would certainly draw attention away from those ridiculous Larry-whatever stories. Or how about Kendall? She's a really nice--” James halted when the most ungodly scent assaulted his nostrils. The boys looked up at him in confusion, the man silently stared into space, the paper slipping from his grip and floating down onto Harry. They could have sworn that they saw James' eyebrows disintegrate into nothingness in a matter of seconds.

“Sister Mary Francis, where are you now?” James breathed out before stumbling backwards and falling to the carpet in an unconscious heap. The five boys stared at James in shock, his eyebrows really were gone! Harry tore his gaze away from the poor man just in time to watch one of the plants in the corner transform before his very eyes. The big green leaves withered up into a sad shade of brown, the entire stem practically became liquid as it plopped down onto the ground, as if someone were holding up a piece of string vertically before letting it go.

Zayn's eyes widened and he quickly covered his face with his hands. “Oh, God, not again.”

“Harry!” Niall yelled indignantly, mirroring Zayn's actions.

“It wasn't me?” Harry defended weakly. He shrunk back into the chair, futilely trying to make himself disappear.

“Right.” Louis said sarcastically, waving a hand in front of his face.

“Look what you did.” Liam pointed to James, who was still out cold on the floor. Harry simply brought the piece of paper up and held it to his face, hiding his red cheeks.

Another one of the managers, Natalie, came into the room. She gasped when she saw James on the floor and rushed over to check him over. She was solaced to find a pulse, indicating that the man was still alive. She turned to face the boys who were still perched in their chairs. “What happened?” She asked urgently.

“He passed out.” Liam explained nonchalantly.

“Yeah, he _passed_ out.” Niall snickered. The blonde received a quizzical look from Natalie and a glare from Liam.

Louis brought a hand to his mouth to conceal his smirk. “You might say it was caused by a... _gas_ leak.” Niall giggled at this. Liam now directed his glare towards the oldest boy while Harry buried his face impossibly deeper into the piece of paper.

Horror spread across Natalie's face. “A gas leak? Are you boys all right? Do any of you feel dizzy or nauseous?”

Niall continued to grin while looking at Harry. "Actually, now that you mentioned 'nauseous', I--" He was abruptly cut off when a hand went flying over his mouth.

“We're fine, really.” Zayn quickly reassured while the Irish lad spoke incoherently into Zayn's palm. Louis, Harry, and Liam emitted their agreements.

“Well, just in case, you boys should get out of here, I'll take care of James. If any of you start to feel off, you should go to a hospital immediately.”

They nodded in understanding and vacated the room almost too eagerly.

Natalie dialed for paramedics. She had just gotten off the phone with a dispatcher when she heard a groan. She looked down saw that James was coming to. The man blinked and grimaced as he rubbed his head. “Nat, what the hell happened to me?”

“The boys said you passed out.” Natalie accounted. “I sent them off. How are you feeling?”

“Just a slight headache.”

“And how were you feeling before you went out? Can you remember?”

James thought for a moment. He remembered calling the boys in for a meeting, he remembered pressing Harry to choose a beard, then there was the most horrific aroma he had ever smelled in his life. Everything went black from there, then he woke up on the floor.

He gasped silently when he saw the pathetically wilted tree in the corner of the room. “My plant! What happened to it?”

“Uh, James?” Natalie asked tentatively, pointing at the man's face. “What happened to your eyebrows?”

James reached up and ran his finger along the bottom of his forehead, feeling nothing but skin. He froze for a moment, and with a whimper he collapsed to the carpet once again.

* * *

Upbeat music rattled the house, one room had the lights shut off and was instead illuminated by blue, pink, and red where partyers danced. Random chatter rang throughout the home as people mingled, stuffed their faces, or drank to their heart's content.

Harry recognized some of the women at the party from the list James had literally shoved into his face the other day. He decided to go talk to some of them, get to know them better, especially since management was planning on forcing him to pretend to be with one of them.

Harry found himself sitting on a short sofa, bored, with Taylor Swift who was ranting about her latest ex-boyfriend. Harry was only listening to every other word, but his attention was soon gone entirely when he laid eyes on the spread on the long table on the opposite side of the room. He realized how hungry he was and excused himself. He made his way to the table and studied all of the food that sat atop it. There was fruit, chicken, pizza, tacos, crisps, cakes, plenty of alcohol and-- Wait, _tacos?_

The curly-haired lad's eyes glistened at the sight of hard corn tortilla shells filled with heavenly goodness, beckoning him, taunting him even. In a trance-like state, Harry reached over and grabbed a taco. He was about to take a big bite when he stopped himself. He brought the food closer to his face so that he could examine it better, it was then he discovered that there was a healthy amount of refried beans in it. He frowned, remembering what had happened before. He debated on putting the taco back and eating something else, but the longer he stared at the delicious looking taco in his hand, the harder it became for him to put it back.

He thought for a moment. What if he ate it slowly? What if he took smaller bites? Maybe that would prevent any appalling smells from coming out of his rectum. Harry thought that he could also just try and take the refried beans out, but that would leave him with one sorry mess of a taco, and he couldn't bring himself to ruin such an Instagram-worthy looking meal. Agreeing with himself that he would take the chance, he took a careful bite out of the taco, savoring the concoction of baked corn flour, meat, veggies, beans, and cheese. By the time he swallowed his first bite, he had a big grin on his face, his dimples prominently showing.

Within a couple of minutes, the whole taco was gone, and it took Harry a lot of willpower to not grab another one. He then went over and leaned his left shoulder against the wall, observing the party as it went on. Over on one end, Nick Grimshaw and Ed Sheeran were having a drink while chatting about something that Harry couldn't make out over all the noise. Behind him, Justin Bieber was leaning back against the same wall, doing something on his phone, paying no mind to anyone around him.

Harry heard someone call out behind him and was about respond, but saw that the individual, a younger woman whom he didn't quite recognize, was speaking to Justin, who deliberately ignored her. The Canadian singer kept his gaze on his phone. The girl asked Justin if she could get a picture with him, the young man scoffed and spat “No.” Barely passing her a glance. The woman sighed but didn't push any further, she then sulked off into the crowd. Harry frowned and shot the fellow musician a questioning look, which was also ignored.

“That wasn't very nice.” The Cheshire boy noted.

Justin briefly made eye contact with Harry, raising an eyebrow before sticking his lower lip out and returning to his phone “Whatever.” He mumbled dismissively.

Harry sighed, he was prepared to seek out the woman himself and cheer her up, but he hardly took one step when he felt his stomach go in knots. A warm pressure formed in his lower region and he grew anxious, realizing what was happening. _Oh, no. Not again, please!_ He clenched his butt cheeks together, hoping that he could hold it in. Sweat dripped down his face as he looked around, searching for a door close by. There was one by the food table that lead to the backyard, but that was a couple of meters away, and Harry was now too afraid to walk, fearing that he would let one rip at the slightest wrong move. But he knew that he had to get out of the house somehow, because he was already picturing tomorrow's headline: _House condemned, many people hospitalized._

“Shouldn't have eaten that taco.” Harry muttered to himself through gritted teeth. Once he was certain that nobody was watching, he shuffled his shoes on the floor, slowly inching his way forward, all the while keeping his butt cheeks together. No one seemed to be paying attention to his odd behavior, which was a plus. In about less than a minute, he would be outside, safe to finally release the deadly fumes begging to escape his body.

But of course, luck wasn't on Harry's side tonight. Two people who were lost in a conversation with each other were suddenly standing in Harry's path. Harry was inadvertently pushed back by the unaware couple and he found himself stumbling to maintain his balance. He was now right back to where he had started. Unfortunately, that was all that it took to make leeway for what Harry feared would be classified as a nuclear explosion.

The 18-year old could only pray that there would be no traces left in his trousers by the time he was finished. Fortunately, the sounds of the party easily overrode that of his bodily functions and everyone appeared to be going about their own business without issue. Harry hoped that the smell wouldn't be too bad, but judging by how warm it felt when it came out, he knew that it was only wishful thinking.

Harry was about to flee before the accusations would start flying when he was approached by Nick. The curly-haired lad put on a convincing smile and greeted his friend.

“Enjoying the party, Harry?” Nick asked.

“Um, yeah, absolutely.” Harry nodded, leaning against the wall again.

“I'm sure you've come to that point where you've seen one party, you've seen them all, am I right?” The radio host joked, playfully jabbing Harry's bicep with his elbow.

“Well, not always, but yeah, this party is pretty typical.” Harry shifted around on the balls of his feet. “Definitely nothing out of the ordinary tonight.”

Behind him, Justin Bieber sniffed before letting his phone slip from his fingers and descend to the floor below, clattering where it landed on the hardwood floor. He inhaled sharply again through his nose, the most horrendous stench that could ever possibly exist on Earth filled his nasal cavities. He then held his fists to his chest, bending his knees inward. He let out a comically high-pitched and very unmanly scream before sprinting towards the closest window, leaping into the air and crashing headfirst through the glass. Several party-goers stared at the now shattered window.

“What the hell was his problem?” Nick wondered.

“I don't know, but I should go find the lads and get going, it's pretty late. Goodnight, Nick!” Harry babbled quickly, hastily retreating from the confused older man, hoping that no one saw his blushing cheeks.

“Oh, sure. See you around, mate!” With that, Nick went off to find other people to interact with, completely unaware of the noxious cloud that he barely dodged, which began to dissipate as it traveled further into the house.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, the five boys were now walking down the dark empty streets, streetlights guiding the way. They were glad to have a chance to just take a nice walk instead of having to be driven around everywhere so that they wouldn't get mobbed by fans.

“I can't believe that actually happened!” Zayn laughed.

“And I didn't even get to see it!” Louis complained.

“I know, right? If only someone had caught that on video.” Niall chuckled.

Liam hid his own amusement, trying to maintain his title as the mature, responsible one of the band, despite there being nobody else around watching them... or so he thought. But he also did it for the sake of Harry, who has stayed quiet the whole walk, clearly too embarrassed to bring any more attention to himself.

“Guys, knock it off.” Liam commanded. “I think poor Harry's had enough.”

“I'll say.” Niall grinned. “If Harry has any more, humanity will end as we know it!”

“Niall...” Liam rolled his eyes and sighed.

Harry wondered if it was possible for your face to melt off caused by the heat from blushing so much. He was slightly worried that something like that could very well happen. And to think, so far he'd managed to cause one of their managers to pass out, kill a plant, and traumatize Justin Bieber. It was funny with the lads, but when it involved other innocent people, it became much to be desired. Harry would do anything right now to just be swallowed up by a hole, he was so ashamed of himself, and his bandmates weren't necessarily easing his discomfort.

As their stroll progressed, none of them were aware of the pair of eyes spying on them from an alleyway, which the group happened to be approaching.

“Hey, remember that interview we did earlier this year?” Zayn quizzed. “The one where we were asked what we loved and hated about one another?”

“Like it was yesterday...” Louis reminisced.

_What is “One Thing” you admire and dislike about each other?_

_The five lads were seated on a cushy sofa, Liam and Louis were sat in the middle, with Harry to their right and Niall to their left. Zayn sat on the backrest behind Harry and Liam._

“ _I admire Harry's charm with ladies.” Louis said._

“ _I admire Harry's dimples.” Zayn contributed._

“ _I admire Harry's curls.” Niall added._

“ _I...” Louis began, now trying to think of something he disliked about their baby brother, which was honestly quite a challenge, because who could possibly have a reason to not like Harry Styles?_

“ _I dislike when Harry steals my food.” Liam interjected, raising his hand, and Niall quickly agreed._

_An imaginary lightbulb popped above Louis' head. The Doncaster lad smirked while looking at their youngest member. “I dislike when Harry farts and pretends it's not him for literally ten minutes.” He emphasized the last part of his sentence. Liam, Niall, and Zayn promptly concurred._

_Harry shook his head and smiled while trying to hold back a laugh._ Really, Louis? This is what you decided to bring up? _“Sometimes I admit it.” He defended, going along with the joke while the others swiftly held firm to their denials._

And It was only a joke, intended to make the viewers laugh. None of the boys counted on it ever becoming a very real predicament.

The night was soon filled with Louis', Zayn's, and Niall's laughter. Liam noticed Harry staring at the ground, his chocolate curls barely covering his eyes. Liam cleared his throat loudly, trying catch the attention of his guffawing bandmates. The cachinnation died down in record time when they heard a sniffle. They all turned to face the youngest, who's bottom lip was quivering, a couple tear trails already on his flushed cheeks.

Their merriment was instantly replaced with guilt as Louis took slow steps in front of the crying boy. “Harry?” Louis asked softly. Harry sniffled again, looking up to meet Louis's piercing blue eyes, as well as the remorseful expressions of Niall and Zayn.

Louis was already mentally kicking himself for getting so carried away that he didn't even notice that he was hurting his best friend. He enveloped the younger singer in a hug, rubbing his hand up and down on Harry's back. “Please don't cry, I'm really sorry for making fun of you.”

Harry tensed for a moment, he was half-tempted to pull away, but he stayed put and allowed the boys to coddle over him. He could never be upset with them for too long. It just wasn't in his nature.

“I'm sorry too.” Niall apologized with sad eyes. The blonde reached over and squeezed Harry's right shoulder.

“It's okay, guys.” Harry sighed as Zayn ruffled his curls. “I forgive you. All of you.” He affirmed.

Louis exhaled a chuckle and kissed his boyfriend's cheek. “You're so sweet, you know that?” He gingerly wiped a stray tear off of Harry's face with his thumb. “Now, no more of that, yeah? Let's enjoy the rest of our walk.”

“Okay.” Harry smiled a little, and the group continued forward.

A hidden figure watched the boys intensely as they got closer and closer, tapping the blade of a knife anxiously, waiting to strike. Once they had all passed the alleyway, Harry felt a hand over his mouth and a strong arm pulling him back. He tried to fight free, but was easily overpowered. The curly-haired lad let out a muffled cry which instantly grabbed the attention of the other boys, who all turned around in time to watch with panic as they saw Harry be dragged back into the alley. They followed, running so fast that Usain Bolt would have been jealous.

The attacker was a tall, burly man who made all of them look small. His seemingly shaved head was covered by a baseball cap, his face sporting a filthy beard. He kept his hold on Harry and revealed his knife and held it to the frightened boy's throat. “Come any closer and I slice him open.” He threatened, his voice low but audible, like a growl. The four other boys came a screeching halt. The look of pure terror on their youngest member's face was something they hated seeing. Louis glared daggers at the man, clenching his fists.

“Let him go.” He demanded firmly. The man just sputtered and laughed.

“If only life were that easy.” The man said thoughtfully. “Now, you blokes listen to me, and you listen good,” He gripped his knife tighter when he felt Harry struggle. “I'm taking this pretty little thing with me.”

“The hell you are!” Louis shouted angrily and took one step forward, Liam and Zayn stepped in to hold him back while the man pressed the blade of his knife against the skin of Harry's throat, causing the boy to whimper. Niall stood there with tear-filled eyes, wishing he could something to get Harry away from that awful man.

“I'm willing to believe that this lad here,” The man gestured toward his squirming captive. “Can fetch me a nice ransom. So, like I said, I'm taking him with me, the rest of you are going to stay right there until we're out of sight.” The man started to take slow steps backwards, keeping a firm hold on Harry, who was silently crying. “I'll make my demands soon enough once I'm safe. But if I find even one constable banging at my door, your friend dies.” The man's dark eyes sent chills down all of their spines. Louis was seething right now, not only was his Harry hurt and in danger, there wasn't anything he could do about it.

The guys watched helplessly as the man started dragging Harry back with him, he removed his hand from over Harry's mouth and brought his arm around Harry's torso, grasping the boy's shoulder while keeping the knife to his throat with the other hand. But Harry refused to help and the man was soon growing tired. “Use your fucking feet.” He ordered. Harry started panting and sweating buckets. His stomach was starting to kill him, and the movements from the man roughly yanking on him was only antagonizing his pained abdomen.

“I-I can't.” Harry whined.

“Yes, you fucking can.” The man argued. “Now, move!”

“No, really, I...” Harry groaned and clenched his stomach. He felt like it was going to explode. “Please, stop, it hurts.”

“Shut the bloody hell up!” The man yelled. “Or else I'll just cut you open right here and do the world a favour.”

Harry moaned as his tummy made sounds like a thunderstorm was going on outside. He clenched his watery eyes shut and tried to focus on his breathing. Not too far away, the other lads watched with discontent, they could tell that something was wrong, besides the fact that Harry was in the hands of some random arsehole, he was hurting, and the man was only making it worse.

“Please,” Harry begged. “It hurts so much.”

“I can't take this anymore.” The man muttered quickly, now beyond frustrated, eyes blazing with fury. He brought the hand holding the knife out and pointed the serrated edge of the blade towards Harry's exposed throat. Harry's eyes widened when he realized what the man was about to do, and the boys did too.

“No!” They all shouted as the knife swiftly approached.

A loud trumpeting sound filled the alleyway and it was like time had froze for a moment. Harry eyes were now shut tightly, waiting for the life-ending pain to come, but none ever did. To the contrary, pain had vacated his body. His aching stomach was now relieved of suffering and he immediately relaxed into the man who was still holding him. Soon remembering his current situation, Harry opened his eyes again, the shine of a blade mere centimeters from his neck gleamed into emerald green. Harry stared as the fingers holding the knife slowly loosened and the weapon fell to the ground, the arm wrapped around the boy also gave way. Instead of fleeing forthwith now that he had the chance, Harry dared to stay put and turn around to look at the man who was about to murder him.

The man was as still as a statue, he emitted a steady, low whine as he stared off into space. His hat was no longer on his head. It had blown off and landed elsewhere, exposing his hairless cranium cap. The ends of his beard were curled to perfection, his teeth which could be seen through his parted lips were stained yellow, and his dark eyes were watering so profusely, it was like a miniature Niagara Falls.

The man snapped out of whatever he was in and stumbled backwards, the sudden actions caused Harry to jump a little. “Jesus, Mother Mary, and Joseph.” The attacker gasped with such fright, it was like Satan himself stood before the man. “Get away from me!” He exclaimed, wide eyes fearfully gaping back at the perplexed curly-haired boy. He tripped over his feet and went falling to the ground, he whimpered and scooted himself back even more before scrambling to his feet. “Get away from me!” Harry just stood there and watched the assailant scream and wave his arms wildly down the alleyway.

Recovering from the shock from the spectacle they had just witnessed, the boys quickly ran over to Harry, only pausing for a second to plug their noses. “Are you all right, Love?” Louis asked, scanning over the younger singer for any wounds.

Still discombobulated by the night's events, Harry was slow to answer. “I'm fine.” He reassured.

“Are you sure?” Niall inquired, also checking the 18-year old over for signs of damage.

“Should we take you to a hospital?” Zayn suggested.

“Guys, I'm okay. Honest."

“We should at least tell the police about--” Liam was about to propose, but was cut off.

“No!” Harry shouted, startling everyone, fantasies were already swirling around in his head about what the tabloids would say if they ever got a hold of even the smallest details about this incident. “I... Can we just all agree that this _never_ happened?”

“But, Haz,” Louis protesred. “We need to at least tell someone about that guy. We can't let that bastard get away with what he did to you.”

“I'd rather we didn't.” Harry admitted. “Besides, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think he's been punished enough already.” This made Niall snicker, which promped Liam to silently shake his head.

“I'll have to agree with that.” The blonde piped in. “I almost feel sorry for the mongrel. Almost.”

Harry sighed heavily. “I ask again, can we just forget about this? Please?” The other four young men were reluctant at first, but upon seeing the pleading look in Harry's eyes, they finally assented.

And thus, one of Harry Styles' most guarded secrets would forever remain a secret.

As they left the alleyway, Niall had seemingly forgotten about some of the events that transpired earlier that night as he started giggling quietly while gently nudging Zayn with his elbow. The raven-haired lad looked at Niall questioningly, and Niall winked at him before breaking out into song.

_"Beans, beans, the magical fruit, the more ya eat, the more ya--"_

"Niall," Harry growled, whipping around to face his smirking bandmate. "I will literally sit on your face while eating a taco if you don't stop it."

The Irish boy's smile vanished and his face went pale. Gulping, he quickly nodded and uttered an apology, stuffing his hands into his pockets, staring at his shoes, nervously shifting around on his feet under the curly-haired lad's glare while yielding much respect to the ultimatum.

Because if Harry were to follow through with such a threat... Well, let's just that Niall didn't want to die-- at least not like that.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


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